State Of Confusion

I have been trying to deny how stressed out I am, but the signs are all there. First, there’s the insomnia. Ambien CR is still helping me get to sleep, but the hours of consecutive sleep continues to shrink.

Then there’s the forgetfullness. I generally feel that I have a terriffic memory – except when I feel stressed. When I get like this, I start mixing up dates or forgetting numbers that have otherwise been engrained in my brain for years. I made it halfway up the west side today on the way to my therapy appointment before I realized my appointment wasn’t until tomorrow.

And the final symptom is usually a heightened state of OCD. I start to organize everything – my CD’s are in order by artist, my DVD’s by movie title, and everything on my desk currently lines up with something else on the desk.

All the signs are there – I still don’t want to admit to it, though. In a last ditch attempt of denial – I mixed all the CD’s and DVD’s back up, messed up my desk and started relying more on the calendar feature of my iPhone.

Problem is, I still can’t sleep…